As the due date draws closer, I'll admit labor and delivery scare me more and more. I did have a freak-out about everything a couple of weeks ago. I'm a lot calmer since then. Now my worries have shifted from the horrible things that might happen to me to the horrible things that might happen to the baby.
It's a strange set of worries because there's nothing I can do about any of them. I'm giving birth in the hospital, there is a NICU, there will be fetal monitoring, and I can't prepare more than that. At first it really helped to tell myself millions of women have done this before me (and millions will after me) but as the date gets closer, that helps less and less.
I find myself much calmer after researching and saying I'll take epidural anesthesia. I guess I was more scared of the pain than I realized. The up-side of course is that each day is another day closer to actually meeting the baby.
I'll try to find time to write about everything once he's actually here.
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